updates

House...I returned from our trip to the mountains with hopes of my house still being on the market. It was...until yesterday. So there's that. But...it lit a tiny kindling kind of fire under my ass to get moving on this house thing. So...if anyone has any advice on how to get out of a truck or lower that payment...let me know...I think it's the last step needed to feel comfortable about going in on this house thing.

Running...yeah...after I realized my lack of adequate footwear was doing wonders to my knee...I have slowed down substantially. It's frustrating but it's just not in the budget (especially with three extra mouths to feed for the next two weeks) to go buy a good pair of shoes. So...I am gonna do some walking and smaller distances in the running area until I can put down the dough. Sucks a bit...but knowing the high level of my proneness to accidents...I should properly stick to the side of caution.

Lola...She has developed a ridiculous attachment to my arms. I honestly have to sneak around the house if she is with someone else because as soon as she spots me...the shrills begin. It's insane. Today I think I sang "twinkle, twinkle", "old mcdonald" and "london bridges" more times than a human mind should ever have to handle just so I could brush my hair and teeth. This kid...I have to admit...my envy of parents with manageable children or easy babies is growing by leaps and bounds.

Girls...It's been awesome having them here. Paisley is quite the young lady and I am hoping she finds her place in such an akward age. Londyn...her and I battle. I'm strict and she defies authority...and she's a daddy's girl. So we clash...but I am hoping we can bond over some painting this week. Sydney...I'm still in shock of this one...she's grown so much. She definitely has some spunk to her.

Kindred...having a blast at his mom's. Visiting family and getting teeth pulled. Sounds like a hoot.

Me...my levels of anxiety have reached an all time high. Honestly...I really think I'm at a breaking point. I was here once before...started medication and then began months of excrutiating chest pains. After an emergency ultrasound and ekg...we found I was allergic to the medicine...so needless to say I am less than excited at the prospect of going that route...and in the last few months have found there are so many other alternatives. So I am going to the wellness center. I hope they can help...for everyone around me sake.

OH....but I do get to go to spokane in a few weeks to see the granny and family. It's been two years...almost excatly since I was there. That in itself is a bit eery. It'll be the 2 year annivesary since my father passed away. I finally went through his stuff on Memorial Day. Talk about avoidance. I'm excited though...my Granny hasn't met Lola yet...and I can't wait.

As for our camping trip...I need more time to process that. It's been atleast 7 years since I last went camping...and I think I am hooked...again.